As you go through the process of winning back your ex girlfriend, you’ll soon realize that one of the most frustrating and confusing aspects is trying to read your ex and her emotions.
Every time you hear from or see your ex girlfriend — even when she’s doing something like updating a Facebook status – she’s be feeding you information you can use to gauge her feelings. You need to lean how to properly read & interpret these signals to ensure you avoid making mistakes and chasing her further away.
Before I go any further, allow me to give you a serious warning: if you misinterpret your ex girlfriend’s feelings and signals, you will likely do or say something that will actually harm your chances of getting back together with her. As a result, I strongly recommend either:
b) signing up for my free email coaching (use the box on the right side of this page to ask a question) to get my advice on reading & interpreting what your ex is saying or doing.
With that warning out of the way, let’s move on to the finer details of reading your ex’s feelings about you.
She Still Has Strong Feelings For You
Yes, this is a bit of a bold proclamation, but I’m going to say it anyway: it’s extremely likely that your ex girlfriend still loves you.
Even if you broke up months ago and your ex is dating someone new, it’s still highly probably that she still has strong romantic feelings for you. She may have told you that she doesn’t love you anymore, but she’s almost certainly lying.
After breaking up, your ex will tell you she doesn’t love you or have feelings for you anymore, even though that’s a fallacy. Why? Because she doesn’t want to hurt you any more than she needs to, and because she thinks telling you that she doesn’t love you will help ensure the breakup stands the test of time.
But in reality, your ex girlfriend used to have strong romantic feelings for you — and those feelings took time to develop and mature. They’re not going away overnight, and she simply can’t erase all the happy and loving memories she has of the time you two spent together.
Interpreting Your Ex Girlfriend’s Mixed Messages
What your ex girlfriend says and does in the weeks following your breakup will reveal several clues about her feelings and will dictate how you go about trying to win her back. Each of the following signals can be used to gauge your ex girlfriend’s feelings:
- She Maintains Contact: If your ex girlfriend contacts you for any reason in the first few weeks after a breakup, it’s almost certainly because she misses you and wants to numb her heartbreak by reaching out to the man she still loves deep down. The more she contacts you — even if it’s about seemingly irrelevant things, like when she can come and pick up her clothes from your house — the more confident you can be that she’s struggling to deal with the breakup.
- She Tries To Be “Friends”: Similar to the point above, if your ex girlfriend says that she wants to be friends and actively tries to hang out with you as a “friend,” it’s a clear signal she’s still interested in being with you. (Don’t jump on the ‘friend’ bandwagon, though — see this video presentation for expert advice from Brad Browning regarding the dreaded ‘friend zone’.)
- She Remains Angry or Upset: If your ex girlfriend was mad or upset about something when she broke up with you, and then she remains angry or upset for days and weeks after the breakup, it’s actually a good sign because it indicates that she still cares.
- She Brings Up Memories & Seems Emotional: If your ex girlfriend seems nostalgic or brings up happy memories about your relationship together (or potentially even negative ones) it means that she’s still actively thinking about her time with you and isn’t ready to let go of those emotions.
Now, just because your ex doesn’t display one of the above signs doesn’t mean that all hope is lost… it just means that she may either be a) further along in the process of moving on and getting over you, or b) she is trying hard not to give in to her feelings and emotions because she wants to go through with her decision to break up with you. Either way, you’re still in good shape and can win her back if you play your cards correctly.
Why She’s Resisting & Not Showing Her Hand
As I said earlier, there’s a very strong possibility that your ex girlfriend is still deeply attached to you. The signals mentioned above are all indications that she still loves you or still needs you in her life. But why, if she’s still romantically interested in you, is your ex not trying to get back together with you?
There are several explanations, but the most important is that she’s probably got a support network feeding her encouragement and ensuring that she doesn’t back down on her decision to break up with you. Even if your ex girlfriend’s friends and family loved you to death, they’ll be feeding your ex encouragement and telling her to stay committed to her decision to break up with you.
These voices of encouragement can be a difficult factor to overcome… your ex girlfriend, like most women, is probably heavily influenced by the opinions of her friends and family. To get past these defense mechanisms, you need to say certain things and use certain psychological tactics that she can’t possibly ignore or resist. Brad Browning has compiled a huge list of things you can do to get past these defense mechanisms using covert psychological tactics, so I recommend you visit his website and watch the free video to get in on some of these sneaky tactics.
Another reason your ex girlfriend is resisting the urge to get back together is because she still has a negative image of you in the back of her mind, despite all the signals she may be sending that she still loves you. That means her “logical, reasoned” side is saying “don’t get back together with this loser!” even when her emotional side wants nothing more than to beg for you to come running back into her arms.
How do you shift this image she has of you? By sending Strong Signals and portraying yourself as a new, high-value man. (These high-value perception tactics are beyond the scope of this article but you should seek expert advice if you’re not sure how to send Strong Signals or display high-value traits)
Your Ex Is As Confused As You Are
As I’m sure you’ve already found out, women can be extremely confusing and interpreting their mixed signals can be like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube. But remember that while she may be sending mixed signals intentionally, it’s more likely that she’s conflicted internally.
Your ex girlfriend doesn’t know for sure whether she wants you back in her life, nor does she know if she’s still in love with you enough to revive the relationship, and her signals and emotions may reflect this confusion and indecision that’s going on in the back of her mind.
No matter what signals she sends, just remember that you need to carefully read and interpret these signals and adjust your strategy appropriately. If you want to get your ex back for good — and build a loving new relationship with her — then you’ll need to respond appropriately to her advances and the signals she is sending you.
As I mentioned before, if you’re confused about her signals and what they mean, then you should seek expert advice to ensure you don’t misinterpret them and ruin your chances of winning her heart back. To get help understanding what your ex is feeling about you and how to use that information to get her back, invest in a top-notch guide that will answer all the potential “what if” scenarios (I recommend The Ex Factor Guide as the most complete resource).